What could be better than a traditional Sunday lunch ??  Being invited to Sunday lunch by DJ Surge – eon and his Ciphr posse.  Having survived most Friday nights in down town Sutton the Daruchini buffet seemed like child’s play to the Ciphr crew and they descended en masse to downtown Binfield for a monster feed.

Bret Myri was delighted to tag along and participate in this splendid occasion but as a seasoned veteran of such occasions was slightly wary of what was in store. Most people know the first rule of “Fight Club”. However everyone should be taught at birth the first rule of Indian dining NEVER EAT THE BUFFET.

As soon as the local men women and children were escorted to a safe distance away, DJ surge – eon held court in the illustrious darunchini of Binfield town. Some were heard to remark how close the décor was to the playboy club but we all know the faux wood panelling and red window blinds were just the cheap way to cover up 50 years of pub toilet in the corner where we sat.

Poppadum’s and the never fail Bangla soon arrived and the bon viveur continued. After perusing the menu for approx. 10 seconds we all decided that the “special” buffet was in order as Alzheimer’s had clearly set in all round, forgetting the first rule.

Starters were actually a treat and the highlight of this dining occasion. Chicken tikka, onion bhajis, samosas and madras sauce brightened the mood even more and a selection of each was eased down by all. More Bangla and it was back up for main course. The sensible diner would have chosen the exit door at this stage and maybe gone for a KFC on the drive home, but one by one we all broke the golden rule and forced our stomachs to digest Lamb madras and chicken naga. It has to be said this will be the only time in many people lives that Chicken Naga can be consumed with no fear of reprisal the next day. Bland curry gravy would be the best description and I pity the young child who spends their formative years eating this dish.  As soon as they venture out at 17 with their mates giving it the large one about “Chicken Naga eat it all the time, bring it on” they are going to get such a rude awakening, sweats and probably a visit to A and E.

Fortunately for us, the Ciphr posse were living it large and the disappointment of breaking the golden rule being just desserts in reality.  Going home having learnt the two golden rules of Sutton made up for the food let down and everyone eagerly awaits the next adventure.

BM

Bret Myri scores this establishment – NIL POINT IT’S A BUFFET YOU IDIOT!!!!!!